January 2003

Up for Discussion: Responding to depression

It's easy to convince a toddler that Mom and Dad are big and strong, but it turns out you have to do the same with your college student. This is especially important if you think your child might be depressed.

According to the director of the UC Davis Counseling Center, Emil Rodolfa, the most common reasons students give for failing to inform their parents when they're emotionally troubled are "I don't want to worry them" or "It would upset them too much."

Let's face it, the news that your child is depressed is upsetting, but if you know about it, you can help. Your support becomes part of a team approach.

In a recent national study, 24 percent of college women and 19 percent of college men described themselves as having been "so depressed it affected functioning" three or more times in the previous year. Ten percent of both genders considered suicide; 1.5 percent attempted it.

But good news exists. According to Rodolfa, depression is one of the most treatable mental health problems. Counseling and psychiatric care are available at the Counseling Center or through the Cowell Student Health Center, by appointment or on a drop-in basis.

Students are assessed for the proper combination of therapy and, perhaps, medication. They can join support or therapy groups, and they can be referred for longer term treatment in the community, if appropriate. Although the university is large, trained ears listen for the cry for help.

The Counseling Center also welcomes phone calls from parents. Although, in general, rules of confidentiality prevent a therapist from disclosing that a student is in counseling, the therapist can listen to parents and perhaps provide suggestions. If the student is being seen at the center and provides written permission, the conversation can continue in both directions.

Here are signs of depression to watch for:

• persistent sad mood;
• loss of interest or pleasure in most activities;
• change in appetite or weight;
• change in sleep pattern;
• restlessness or decreased activity;
• loss of energy/feeling tired all the time;
• difficulty concentrating or making decisions;
• feeling worthless or excessive guilt;
• recurrent thoughts of death or suicide; and
• increased physical complaints.

Sometimes parents refrain from questioning their children because they don't want to push or intrude. Rodolfa urges a more proactive approach. Parents should come forward with the message that they can handle bad news and are eager to hear what college is really like. If the student seems depressed, parents can offer support and suggest counseling.

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